Today we walk back from camp to be given an individual debrief before heading home. The walk back was along a mining track which again offered amazing views across to Cnicht.
After spending 5 days within the company of 6 others I was filled with mixed emotions. I had loved the time I had spent in the company of these great people. They had a wealth of experience and knowledge which made the week interesting and fun. The outdoors is a really good way to connect with others who have similar interests.
On the other hand I was peopled out. The training had been exhausting and I had had very little time away from others. I was also really missing my children and wanted to get home to them. So when we got off of the minibus at Arthog I felt the excitement of returning home.
Coupled with oodles of excitement I was a little anxious about what my debrief would include. What they tell me to improve upon in preparation for the assessment. I was walking off the mountains focussing on all the stupid mistakes I had made. My inner voice doubted my ability to even absorb all the things I needed to provide evidence for during the assessment.
The British Mountain Leader Award is seen as the gold standard for mountain leader qualifications worldwide. It is considered a very prestigious award. A lot of people fail in getting the award and a lot of awards are deferred until further skills are learnt. The award was starting to feel just out of my grasp.
Both Laurie and I had discussed how quickly we could complete our 20 quality days whilst focussing on the list of skills to improve. The list we would be given in our debrief. We had set a plan to be ready by October 2020. 18 months to perfect our skills.
The assessor had spoken to everyone in turn on our way off of the hill, but ran out of time to do mine so I had to wait until after lunch. Only prolonging the pain. When he called me into the office the anxiety was high
To my surprise he said to me that if I had been on the training this week I would have passed. He told me to take the assessment as soon as possible because I was ready. He could see the wealth of experience I had and I was aware of my weaknesses and adapted adequately to offer a safe environment for myself and the people I was responsible for. He went on to say that he could see me and Laurie going on to do international mountain leader training and having a retreat centre in which we take small groups through the mountains giving them an all rounded experience. I was exactly the kind of person who the mountain assessors want to get the leader qualification.
I could breathe. My mistakes were exactly that, mistakes which I moved forward positively from, brushing them to one side and moving forward. I could now breathe. I would go away and practice the new skills I had learnt and rethink the 18 month timeframe we had allocated to achieve this qualification.
Right now I’m tired and I’m very much looking forward to heading home to be with my children.
Walking to health; the challenge 